'Nother Gig Story

Discussion in 'rec.music.guitar' started by Pete Kerezman, Aug 28, 2003.

  1. Forgot about this more recent one, which I told my wife as soon as I
    got home:

    It was at the naval air station again, this time for a "winging"
    party that the pilots hold when they get their wings. Our
    neighborhood air base trains the navy's premier jet fighter pilots, so
    they attract lots of groupies. And the guy pilots, being who and what
    they are, don't tend to hang with hounds. So the groupies are almost
    always very attractive.

    Anyway, we were on a break and I'm standing there sippin' at my
    water bottle, takin' it all in, when up walks an EXTREEMELY attractive
    and particularly healthy looking young blond cutie. Absolutely
    radiant, she was.

    "How long have you been a musician?" she asks. "I'm studying music
    too, at (some school in Minnesota, or another frozen yankee hell, that
    I'd never heard of). Golly, you play well."

    I can actually *feel* my head beginning to expand as she continues
    on with compliment after compliment and gives me the distinct vibe
    that she's hitting on me, a gnarly old fart who's nearly old enough to
    be her grandpa. "I've still got it," I think to myself.

    Then she says "And I'm telling you all this because I'm really,
    really drunk."

    PHSSSSsssssssst... deflated like howlie's sheep on a bad day.

    I felt a little bad because I know what it takes to be that drunk
    and present a completely sober appearance, but I appreciated being
    brought back to reality and the recollection still makes me smile.

    Texas Pete
  2. howldog

    howldog Guest

    On Thu, 28 Aug 2003 13:31:06 GMT, petekerez@aol.com (Pete Kerezman)
    wrote:


    > "How long have you been a musician?" she asks. "I'm studying music
    >too, at (some school in Minnesota, or another frozen yankee hell, that
    >I'd never heard of). Golly, you play well."
    >
    > I can actually *feel* my head beginning to expand as she continues
    >on with compliment after compliment and gives me the distinct vibe
    >that she's hitting on me, a gnarly old fart who's nearly old enough to
    >be her grandpa. "I've still got it," I think to myself.
    >
    > Then she says "And I'm telling you all this because I'm really,
    >really drunk."
    >
    > PHSSSSsssssssst... deflated like howlie's sheep on a bad day.



    Dude. you got it all wrong.

    whats the mating call of the southern blonde?

    "I'm sooooooooo drunk!"
  3. Odin

    Odin Guest

    "Pete Kerezman" <petekerez@aol.com> wrote in message

    > Forgot about this more recent one, which I told my wife

    as soon as I
    > got home:
    >
    > It was at the naval air station again, this time for a

    "winging"
    > party that the pilots hold when they get their wings. Our
    > neighborhood air base trains the navy's premier jet

    fighter pilots, so
    > they attract lots of groupies. And the guy pilots, being

    who and what
    > they are, don't tend to hang with hounds. So the groupies

    are almost
    > always very attractive.
    >
    > Anyway, we were on a break and I'm standing there

    sippin' at my
    > water bottle, takin' it all in, when up walks an

    EXTREEMELY attractive
    > and particularly healthy looking young blond cutie.

    Absolutely
    > radiant, she was.
    >
    > "How long have you been a musician?" she asks. "I'm

    studying music
    > too, at (some school in Minnesota, or another frozen

    yankee hell, that
    > I'd never heard of). Golly, you play well."
    >
    > I can actually *feel* my head beginning to expand as she

    continues
    > on with compliment after compliment and gives me the

    distinct vibe
    > that she's hitting on me, a gnarly old fart who's nearly

    old enough to
    > be her grandpa. "I've still got it," I think to myself.
    >
    > Then she says "And I'm telling you all this because I'm

    really,
    > really drunk."
    >
    > PHSSSSsssssssst... deflated like howlie's sheep on a bad

    day.
    >
    > I felt a little bad because I know what it takes to be

    that drunk
    > and present a completely sober appearance, but I

    appreciated being
    > brought back to reality and the recollection still makes

    me smile.
    >
    > Texas Pete


    Are you kidding? She gave you the green light.
  4. howldog wrote:

    >On Thu, 28 Aug 2003 13:31:06 GMT (Pete Kerezman)
    >wrote:
    >
    >
    >> "How long have you been a musician?" she asks. "I'm studying music
    >>too, at (some school in Minnesota, or another frozen yankee hell, that
    >>I'd never heard of). Golly, you play well."
    >>
    >> I can actually *feel* my head beginning to expand as she continues
    >>on with compliment after compliment and gives me the distinct vibe
    >>that she's hitting on me, a gnarly old fart who's nearly old enough to
    >>be her grandpa. "I've still got it," I think to myself.
    >>
    >> Then she says "And I'm telling you all this because I'm really,
    >>really drunk."
    >>
    >> PHSSSSsssssssst... deflated like howlie's sheep on a bad day.

    >
    >
    >Dude. you got it all wrong.
    >
    >whats the mating call of the southern blonde?
    >
    >"I'm sooooooooo drunk!"


    If only her grandma had been there and just as drunk! I'm no child
    molester. I like my groupies to be grannies.

    Texas Pete
  5. Grant

    Grant Guest

    Pete Kerezman wrote:

    > I can actually *feel* my head beginning to expand as she continues
    > on with compliment after compliment and gives me the distinct vibe
    > that she's hitting on me, a gnarly old fart who's nearly old enough to
    > be her grandpa. "I've still got it," I think to myself.
    >
    > Then she says "And I'm telling you all this because I'm really,
    > really drunk."
    >
    > PHSSSSsssssssst... deflated like howlie's sheep on a bad day.
    >


    Huh. If it were me, I don't know if that revelation would have
    completely destroyed my enjoyment of the moment. Compliments from
    drunks are better than no compliments at all. And compliments from
    attractive women are always savored, no matter how ephemeral or
    insincere the motives.

    One of my favorite recollections from our very first public gig was a
    guy coming up to the stage at the end and pressing $20 bills into our
    hands ("to buy ourselves some drinks"), because he was so happy with
    what we played. Sure, he was drunk, and we knew he wouldn't have done
    it otherwise, but we still got a big kick out of it, being our first gig
    and all.
  6. howldog

    howldog Guest

    On Thu, 28 Aug 2003 11:59:33 -0500, Pete Kerezman <petekerez@aol.com>
    wrote:

    > I like my groupies to be grannies.



    the new Texas Pete hit single, to the tune of, "All my Exes live in
    Texas"
  7. howldog

    howldog Guest

    On Thu, 28 Aug 2003 12:33:30 -0500, Grant <gpetty@aos.wisc.edu> wrote:

    > And compliments from
    >attractive women are always savored, no matter how ephemeral or
    >insincere the motives.



    horny academians are always so funny.
  8. Odin wrote:

    >Are you kidding? She gave you the green light.


    I'm a funny guy. I'd rather meet polfarce than fool around on my
    wife.

    Texas Pete
  9. ryanm

    ryanm Guest

    "Pete Kerezman" <petekerez@aol.com> wrote in message
    news:94dskv0uvh0u9h0i6upmirfn676tja8ef7@4ax.com...
    >
    > If only her grandma had been there and just as drunk! I'm no child
    > molester. I like my groupies to be grannies.
    >

    Remember the movie Dazed and Confused?

    <Matt McConaughey voice>

    You know what I like about high school girls? I get older, they stay the
    same age...

    </voice>

    ryanm
  10. Odin

    Odin Guest

    "Pete Kerezman" <petekerez@aol.com> wrote in message

    > Odin wrote:
    >
    > >Are you kidding? She gave you the green light.

    >
    > I'm a funny guy. I'd rather meet polfarce than fool

    around on my
    > wife.
    >
    > Texas Pete


    I wouldn't fool around with a gig groupie either, but I also
    wouldn't want to meet Polfarce. I was just sayin', she was
    giving you the go ahead to make a move.
  11. Robb Scott

    Robb Scott Guest

    In article <3f4e7494$1@shknews01>, "Odin" <res0jmoj@verizon.net> wrote:

    > I was just sayin', she was
    > giving you the go ahead to make a move.


    A little voice inside my head would be saying "Hey, she's beautiful,
    drunk, is interested in me, and is likely attending this bash with a
    trained killer....".

    /-/-/-/-|-\-\-\-\
    The One True Robb
    \-\-\-\-|-/-/-/-/
  12. On Fri, 29 Aug 2003 10:38:35 GMT, Robb Scott
    <robbscott@comcast.net.REMOVE> wrote:

    >> I was just sayin', she was
    >> giving you the go ahead to make a move.

    >
    >A little voice inside my head would be saying "Hey, she's beautiful,
    >drunk, is interested in me, and is likely attending this bash with a
    >trained killer....".


    All the marines I've met are much too polite to beat up an old man,
    and if I can't beat up an Annapolis grad then I deserve to get my ass
    kicked.

    But the point is, I got no need to make a move when I've got it so
    good at home.

    Texas Pete
  13. Pete Kerezman <petekerez@aol.com> wrote in message news:<5mlskv8e14gjoe1a4v202u8ui0lsvbvjqs@4ax.com>...

    > I'm a funny guy. I'd rather meet polfarce than fool around on my
    > wife.


    Then maybe you should start taking her to your gigs.
  14. On 29 Aug 2003 11:46:35 -0700, lbrty4us@aol.com wrote:

    >> I'm a funny guy. I'd rather meet polfarce than fool around on my
    >> wife.

    >
    >Then maybe you should start taking her to your gigs.


    Matter of fact she comes to most of 'em. Didn't happen to be at
    that one.

    Texas Pete
  15. salvarsan

    salvarsan Guest

    howldog wrote:
    > Grant, using Harvardian sequipedalian polysyllably, reaffirmed:


    >> And compliments from
    >> attractive women are always savored, no matter how ephemeral or
    >> insincere the motives.

    >
    > horny academians are always so funny.



    Haw!

    S'matter, Howlie?
    English yer second language? ;^)

    -drh
    --
  16. howldog

    howldog Guest

    On Sat, 30 Aug 2003 19:13:59 GMT, salvarsan <salvarsan@radix.net>
    wrote:


    >S'matter, Howlie?
    >English yer second language? ;^)



    apparently i aint learnt the first one yet.


    I think grant should change his bands name to

    The Horny Academians
  17. Grant

    Grant Guest

    howldog wrote:
    > On Sat, 30 Aug 2003 19:13:59 GMT, salvarsan <salvarsan@radix.net>
    > wrote:
    >
    >
    >
    >>S'matter, Howlie?
    >>English yer second language? ;^)

    >
    >
    >
    > apparently i aint learnt the first one yet.
    >
    >
    > I think grant should change his bands name to
    >
    > The Horny Academians
    >


    To tell the truth, I have been pushing the name "Profs Gone Wild", but
    the rest of the band hasn't bought into it yet.

    - Grant
  18. howldog

    howldog Guest

    On Tue, 02 Sep 2003 12:54:53 -0500, Grant <gpetty@aos.wisc.edu> wrote:



    >
    >To tell the truth, I have been pushing the name "Profs Gone Wild",




    hey, keep that slide rule in your pants, where it belongs.

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