skinny dipping

Discussion in 'rec.music.percussion' started by Mike Rittenhouse, Sep 2, 2003.

  1. I love hearing stories of life from musicians, especially the rough stories.
    With that in mind I offer this little ditty. I don't think I've been able
    to share it with anyone here yet. Feel free to chime in with your own tales
    of misery on the road...

    So, I was on the Carnival ship 'Spirit' about a year and a half ago. I was
    in a very good jazz trio with Reggie Bishop on piano and Chris Riggenbach on
    upright bass. We were doing this run that would bring us to Barbados every
    other Wednesday, and as most of the crew did, I would head down to "The
    Boatyard", a beach bar that is maybe a half hour walk from the docks where
    our ship was tied. It was a loud and obnoxious place, but the drinks were
    cheap(2 happy hours!), the bikinis were everywhere, and at sunset they would
    start a big fire on the beach. Just about everything you need for a good
    day off!

    My girlfriend was a bartender on the ship, and on many Wednesdays we would
    go to the Boatyard, have a couple cocktails and cap the night off with a
    moonlit skinny dip, just far enough away from prying eyes not to be seen...
    it was a great time. Here's where the story picks up... one afternoon she
    had to work, so I went out essentially alone. I ran into some friends at
    the Boatyard, and we took turns going to the bar and taking advantage of the
    2 for 1 Jagermeister shots. I didn't get too silly, just feeling good plus
    one. The fire was blazing, the night was perfect, and since this was my
    last Barbados before the ship changed routes I decided to spend my last half
    hour on the island swimming 'free'. I moved only about 20 feet from where
    other ship folk were, and went for a skinny dip alone. Errr... bad idea. A
    half hour later I started hearing commotion as people started to leave back
    to the ship, so I hustled out of the water hoping to share a taxi with
    someone. Alas, life became more difficult... I was walking up and down the
    beach looking for my clothes with no luck! Soon the club security came to
    help me- it was getting late and my ship would not wait for me. I stumbled
    over something. It was my sandals, exactly where I thought I had left my
    stuff. Someone had taken everything! My glasses(I'm completely blind
    without them), my watch, wallet, all my clothes except for my sandals!
    Arrrrg! What a nightmare! The bar guys were laughing... I asked them for a
    towel, and all they could find was a bar rag, more like a doily than
    anything... it was way too small! Not even big enough to cover my privates.
    Unbelievable! They managed to hook me up with a fellow musician who was
    late grabbing a taxi(I had no money on me anymore!), and he kindly offered
    to pay, all the while snapping photos and going into a fetal position from
    laughing so hard along with his girlfriend. I tell you, thank goodness for
    the Jager buzz I had going, otherwise I might have wept...

    The taxi driver said he thought he knew who had my stuff. He took us
    through the downtown area. I was happy he had tinted windows. No luck. So
    I get back to the port, climb out of the taxi and run quickly to the port
    shuttle bus, both hands clasped around my manhood and the anemic doily. 2
    minutes later I'm at the gangway, and I can hear the laughter coming from
    the passenger decks up above... I was blind as a bat, but I could see all
    the photo flashes going off! It was beyond belief. I booted up the
    gangway. I didn't have my ship I.D.(it was in my shorts), but security
    recognized me through their tears of laughter. Just my luck... the pay
    window was right beside the gangway, and all the dancers were there lined up
    to get paid for their extra activities on the ship. F*&k!!! I raced the
    length of the ship to my cabin, only to realize I didn't have my cabin key
    anymore... I raced back to the gangway, ass feeling the breeze, and got a
    security guard to come and open up my cabin. I couldn't believe what had
    just happened to me... the Jager made it feel like someone else's
    nightmare.

    After all this, I threw on my clothes and went up to my girl's bar. I
    huffed and puffed and sputtered the story out to her, and after hearing the
    whole thing she just stared at me and said "Are you DRUNK!?".

    Moral of the story... I'm up for suggestions. I guess never go skinny
    dipping alone? Don't take your wallet and personal I.D. to the beach!
    That's a lesson learned. Total cost of this outing: USD $300 glasses, $200
    cash, all my personal I.D., $15 ship I.D.(bastards wouldn't let me off, even
    though I was robbed!), $100 watch, $50 clothes. Oh yeah... dignity...
    priceless? At least I have a good story eh.

    Mike
  2. LOL!! Great story, Mike!

    Feeling good plus one, (I'm stealing that!)
    CM

    "Mike Rittenhouse" <zippofluid@hotmail.com> wrote in message
    news:pm85b.7564$Pa1.338691@read1.cgocable.net...
    > I love hearing stories of life from musicians, especially the rough

    stories.
    > With that in mind I offer this little ditty. I don't think I've been able
    > to share it with anyone here yet. Feel free to chime in with your own

    tales
    > of misery on the road...
    >
    > So, I was on the Carnival ship 'Spirit' about a year and a half ago. I

    was
    > in a very good jazz trio with Reggie Bishop on piano and Chris Riggenbach

    on
    > upright bass. We were doing this run that would bring us to Barbados

    every
    > other Wednesday, and as most of the crew did, I would head down to "The
    > Boatyard", a beach bar that is maybe a half hour walk from the docks where
    > our ship was tied. It was a loud and obnoxious place, but the drinks were
    > cheap(2 happy hours!), the bikinis were everywhere, and at sunset they

    would
    > start a big fire on the beach. Just about everything you need for a good
    > day off!
    >
    > My girlfriend was a bartender on the ship, and on many Wednesdays we would
    > go to the Boatyard, have a couple cocktails and cap the night off with a
    > moonlit skinny dip, just far enough away from prying eyes not to be

    seen...
    > it was a great time. Here's where the story picks up... one afternoon she
    > had to work, so I went out essentially alone. I ran into some friends at
    > the Boatyard, and we took turns going to the bar and taking advantage of

    the
    > 2 for 1 Jagermeister shots. I didn't get too silly, just feeling good

    plus
    > one. The fire was blazing, the night was perfect, and since this was my
    > last Barbados before the ship changed routes I decided to spend my last

    half
    > hour on the island swimming 'free'. I moved only about 20 feet from where
    > other ship folk were, and went for a skinny dip alone. Errr... bad idea.

    A
    > half hour later I started hearing commotion as people started to leave

    back
    > to the ship, so I hustled out of the water hoping to share a taxi with
    > someone. Alas, life became more difficult... I was walking up and down

    the
    > beach looking for my clothes with no luck! Soon the club security came to
    > help me- it was getting late and my ship would not wait for me. I

    stumbled
    > over something. It was my sandals, exactly where I thought I had left my
    > stuff. Someone had taken everything! My glasses(I'm completely blind
    > without them), my watch, wallet, all my clothes except for my sandals!
    > Arrrrg! What a nightmare! The bar guys were laughing... I asked them for

    a
    > towel, and all they could find was a bar rag, more like a doily than
    > anything... it was way too small! Not even big enough to cover my

    privates.
    > Unbelievable! They managed to hook me up with a fellow musician who was
    > late grabbing a taxi(I had no money on me anymore!), and he kindly offered
    > to pay, all the while snapping photos and going into a fetal position from
    > laughing so hard along with his girlfriend. I tell you, thank goodness

    for
    > the Jager buzz I had going, otherwise I might have wept...
    >
    > The taxi driver said he thought he knew who had my stuff. He took us
    > through the downtown area. I was happy he had tinted windows. No luck.

    So
    > I get back to the port, climb out of the taxi and run quickly to the port
    > shuttle bus, both hands clasped around my manhood and the anemic doily. 2
    > minutes later I'm at the gangway, and I can hear the laughter coming from
    > the passenger decks up above... I was blind as a bat, but I could see all
    > the photo flashes going off! It was beyond belief. I booted up the
    > gangway. I didn't have my ship I.D.(it was in my shorts), but security
    > recognized me through their tears of laughter. Just my luck... the pay
    > window was right beside the gangway, and all the dancers were there lined

    up
    > to get paid for their extra activities on the ship. F*&k!!! I raced the
    > length of the ship to my cabin, only to realize I didn't have my cabin key
    > anymore... I raced back to the gangway, ass feeling the breeze, and got a
    > security guard to come and open up my cabin. I couldn't believe what had
    > just happened to me... the Jager made it feel like someone else's
    > nightmare.
    >
    > After all this, I threw on my clothes and went up to my girl's bar. I
    > huffed and puffed and sputtered the story out to her, and after hearing

    the
    > whole thing she just stared at me and said "Are you DRUNK!?".
    >
    > Moral of the story... I'm up for suggestions. I guess never go skinny
    > dipping alone? Don't take your wallet and personal I.D. to the beach!
    > That's a lesson learned. Total cost of this outing: USD $300 glasses,

    $200
    > cash, all my personal I.D., $15 ship I.D.(bastards wouldn't let me off,

    even
    > though I was robbed!), $100 watch, $50 clothes. Oh yeah... dignity...
    > priceless? At least I have a good story eh.
    >
    > Mike
    >
    >
    >
  3. Robert Schuh

    Robert Schuh Guest

    Mike Rittenhouse wrote:

    > I love hearing stories of life from musicians, especially the rough stories.
    > With that in mind I offer this little ditty. I don't think I've been able
    > to share it with anyone here yet. Feel free to chime in with your own tales
    > of misery on the road...
    >
    > So, I was on the Carnival ship 'Spirit' about a year and a half ago. I was
    > in a very good jazz trio with Reggie Bishop on piano and Chris Riggenbach on
    > upright bass. We were doing this run that would bring us to Barbados every
    > other Wednesday, and as most of the crew did, I would head down to "The
    > Boatyard", a beach bar that is maybe a half hour walk from the docks where
    > our ship was tied. It was a loud and obnoxious place, but the drinks were
    > cheap(2 happy hours!), the bikinis were everywhere, and at sunset they would
    > start a big fire on the beach. Just about everything you need for a good
    > day off!
    >
    > My girlfriend was a bartender on the ship, and on many Wednesdays we would
    > go to the Boatyard, have a couple cocktails and cap the night off with a
    > moonlit skinny dip, just far enough away from prying eyes not to be seen...
    > it was a great time. Here's where the story picks up... one afternoon she
    > had to work, so I went out essentially alone. I ran into some friends at
    > the Boatyard, and we took turns going to the bar and taking advantage of the
    > 2 for 1 Jagermeister shots. I didn't get too silly, just feeling good plus
    > one. The fire was blazing, the night was perfect, and since this was my
    > last Barbados before the ship changed routes I decided to spend my last half
    > hour on the island swimming 'free'. I moved only about 20 feet from where
    > other ship folk were, and went for a skinny dip alone. Errr... bad idea. A
    > half hour later I started hearing commotion as people started to leave back
    > to the ship, so I hustled out of the water hoping to share a taxi with
    > someone. Alas, life became more difficult... I was walking up and down the
    > beach looking for my clothes with no luck! Soon the club security came to
    > help me- it was getting late and my ship would not wait for me. I stumbled
    > over something. It was my sandals, exactly where I thought I had left my
    > stuff. Someone had taken everything! My glasses(I'm completely blind
    > without them), my watch, wallet, all my clothes except for my sandals!
    > Arrrrg! What a nightmare! The bar guys were laughing... I asked them for a
    > towel, and all they could find was a bar rag, more like a doily than
    > anything... it was way too small! Not even big enough to cover my privates.
    > Unbelievable! They managed to hook me up with a fellow musician who was
    > late grabbing a taxi(I had no money on me anymore!), and he kindly offered
    > to pay, all the while snapping photos and going into a fetal position from
    > laughing so hard along with his girlfriend. I tell you, thank goodness for
    > the Jager buzz I had going, otherwise I might have wept...
    >
    > The taxi driver said he thought he knew who had my stuff. He took us
    > through the downtown area. I was happy he had tinted windows. No luck. So
    > I get back to the port, climb out of the taxi and run quickly to the port
    > shuttle bus, both hands clasped around my manhood and the anemic doily. 2
    > minutes later I'm at the gangway, and I can hear the laughter coming from
    > the passenger decks up above... I was blind as a bat, but I could see all
    > the photo flashes going off! It was beyond belief. I booted up the
    > gangway. I didn't have my ship I.D.(it was in my shorts), but security
    > recognized me through their tears of laughter. Just my luck... the pay
    > window was right beside the gangway, and all the dancers were there lined up
    > to get paid for their extra activities on the ship. F*&k!!! I raced the
    > length of the ship to my cabin, only to realize I didn't have my cabin key
    > anymore... I raced back to the gangway, ass feeling the breeze, and got a
    > security guard to come and open up my cabin. I couldn't believe what had
    > just happened to me... the Jager made it feel like someone else's
    > nightmare.
    >
    > After all this, I threw on my clothes and went up to my girl's bar. I
    > huffed and puffed and sputtered the story out to her, and after hearing the
    > whole thing she just stared at me and said "Are you DRUNK!?".
    >
    > Moral of the story... I'm up for suggestions. I guess never go skinny
    > dipping alone? Don't take your wallet and personal I.D. to the beach!
    > That's a lesson learned. Total cost of this outing: USD $300 glasses, $200
    > cash, all my personal I.D., $15 ship I.D.(bastards wouldn't let me off, even
    > though I was robbed!), $100 watch, $50 clothes. Oh yeah... dignity...
    > priceless? At least I have a good story eh.
    >
    > Mike


    I would never leave my stuff anywhere. I have had nightmares about losing that
    kind of crap. Funny story though! :)


    --
    Robert Schuh
    "Everything that elevates an individual above the herd and
    intimidates the neighbour is henceforth called evil; and
    the fair, modest, submissive and conforming mentality,
    the mediocrity of desires attains moral designations and honors"
    - Nietzsche

    "The meek shall inherit nothing" - Zappa
  4. kujawat

    kujawat Guest

    HA! CLASSIC!

    Tony

    "Mike Rittenhouse" <zippofluid@hotmail.com> wrote in message
    news:pm85b.7564$Pa1.338691@read1.cgocable.net...
    > I love hearing stories of life from musicians, especially the rough

    stories.
    > With that in mind I offer this little ditty. I don't think I've been able
    > to share it with anyone here yet. Feel free to chime in with your own

    tales
    > of misery on the road...
    >
    > So, I was on the Carnival ship 'Spirit' about a year and a half ago. I

    was
    > in a very good jazz trio with Reggie Bishop on piano and Chris Riggenbach

    on
    > upright bass. We were doing this run that would bring us to Barbados

    every
    > other Wednesday, and as most of the crew did, I would head down to "The
    > Boatyard", a beach bar that is maybe a half hour walk from the docks where
    > our ship was tied. It was a loud and obnoxious place, but the drinks were
    > cheap(2 happy hours!), the bikinis were everywhere, and at sunset they

    would
    > start a big fire on the beach. Just about everything you need for a good
    > day off!
    >
    > My girlfriend was a bartender on the ship, and on many Wednesdays we would
    > go to the Boatyard, have a couple cocktails and cap the night off with a
    > moonlit skinny dip, just far enough away from prying eyes not to be

    seen...
    > it was a great time. Here's where the story picks up... one afternoon she
    > had to work, so I went out essentially alone. I ran into some friends at
    > the Boatyard, and we took turns going to the bar and taking advantage of

    the
    > 2 for 1 Jagermeister shots. I didn't get too silly, just feeling good

    plus
    > one. The fire was blazing, the night was perfect, and since this was my
    > last Barbados before the ship changed routes I decided to spend my last

    half
    > hour on the island swimming 'free'. I moved only about 20 feet from where
    > other ship folk were, and went for a skinny dip alone. Errr... bad idea.

    A
    > half hour later I started hearing commotion as people started to leave

    back
    > to the ship, so I hustled out of the water hoping to share a taxi with
    > someone. Alas, life became more difficult... I was walking up and down

    the
    > beach looking for my clothes with no luck! Soon the club security came to
    > help me- it was getting late and my ship would not wait for me. I

    stumbled
    > over something. It was my sandals, exactly where I thought I had left my
    > stuff. Someone had taken everything! My glasses(I'm completely blind
    > without them), my watch, wallet, all my clothes except for my sandals!
    > Arrrrg! What a nightmare! The bar guys were laughing... I asked them for

    a
    > towel, and all they could find was a bar rag, more like a doily than
    > anything... it was way too small! Not even big enough to cover my

    privates.
    > Unbelievable! They managed to hook me up with a fellow musician who was
    > late grabbing a taxi(I had no money on me anymore!), and he kindly offered
    > to pay, all the while snapping photos and going into a fetal position from
    > laughing so hard along with his girlfriend. I tell you, thank goodness

    for
    > the Jager buzz I had going, otherwise I might have wept...
    >
    > The taxi driver said he thought he knew who had my stuff. He took us
    > through the downtown area. I was happy he had tinted windows. No luck.

    So
    > I get back to the port, climb out of the taxi and run quickly to the port
    > shuttle bus, both hands clasped around my manhood and the anemic doily. 2
    > minutes later I'm at the gangway, and I can hear the laughter coming from
    > the passenger decks up above... I was blind as a bat, but I could see all
    > the photo flashes going off! It was beyond belief. I booted up the
    > gangway. I didn't have my ship I.D.(it was in my shorts), but security
    > recognized me through their tears of laughter. Just my luck... the pay
    > window was right beside the gangway, and all the dancers were there lined

    up
    > to get paid for their extra activities on the ship. F*&k!!! I raced the
    > length of the ship to my cabin, only to realize I didn't have my cabin key
    > anymore... I raced back to the gangway, ass feeling the breeze, and got a
    > security guard to come and open up my cabin. I couldn't believe what had
    > just happened to me... the Jager made it feel like someone else's
    > nightmare.
    >
    > After all this, I threw on my clothes and went up to my girl's bar. I
    > huffed and puffed and sputtered the story out to her, and after hearing

    the
    > whole thing she just stared at me and said "Are you DRUNK!?".
    >
    > Moral of the story... I'm up for suggestions. I guess never go skinny
    > dipping alone? Don't take your wallet and personal I.D. to the beach!
    > That's a lesson learned. Total cost of this outing: USD $300 glasses,

    $200
    > cash, all my personal I.D., $15 ship I.D.(bastards wouldn't let me off,

    even
    > though I was robbed!), $100 watch, $50 clothes. Oh yeah... dignity...
    > priceless? At least I have a good story eh.
    >
    > Mike
    >
    >
    >
  5. Frisco

    Frisco Guest

    Heeee! Definitely something to wonder about, tho. Kind'a the mix
    between the going-to-school-in-your-underwear dreams and sleep-walking
    at a hotel on a business trip and waking up naked in the hall without
    your key.

    Me and the wife go skinny dipping and fall asleep on the beach all the
    time in the Carribean and haven't ever had a problem. More often than
    not we run into other skinny dippers.

    Thinking about it tho, I think I'm going to leave my passport and id's
    back in the hotel/ship or else put them in a waterproof wallet and
    strap it around my ankle.

    Paul


    On Tue, 2 Sep 2003 17:52:57 -0400, "Mike Rittenhouse"
    <zippofluid@hotmail.com> wrote:

    >
    >Moral of the story... I'm up for suggestions. I guess never go skinny
    >dipping alone? Don't take your wallet and personal I.D. to the beach!
    >That's a lesson learned. Total cost of this outing: USD $300 glasses, $200
    >cash, all my personal I.D., $15 ship I.D.(bastards wouldn't let me off, even
    >though I was robbed!), $100 watch, $50 clothes. Oh yeah... dignity...
    >priceless? At least I have a good story eh.
    >
    >Mike
    >
    >
  6. Mike Rittenhouse <zippofluid@hotmail.com> wrote:
    > Arrrrg! The bar guys were laughing... I asked them for a
    > towel, and all they could find was a bar rag, more like a doily than
    > anything... it was way too small! Not even big enough to cover my
    > privates


    Sounds like bragging to me!
    :)

    Benj

    --
    SPAM-Guard! Remove .users (if present) to email me!
  7. "Mike Rittenhouse" <zippofluid@hotmail.com> wrote in message
    news:pm85b.7564$Pa1.338691@read1.cgocable.net...
    > I love hearing stories of life from musicians, especially the rough

    stories.
    > With that in mind I offer this little ditty. I don't think I've been able
    > to share it with anyone here yet. Feel free to chime in with your own

    tales
    > of misery on the road...



    Sometimes you just have to say 'hell with it' and act like nothing is amiss.

    PP
  8. creux

    creux Guest

    GREAT story!!!
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